Tuesday, November 30, 2010

A Christmas Story breakdown

I'm alive, but just barely.  The holiday was a killer, in terms of calories/fat ingested.  I may need a complete organ replacement procedure by the time New Year's hits. 

Taken from the website for the A Christmas Story Museum
I'm currently sitting on the couch with a dog behind my back and a kid snuggling with my left leg, under a blanket, watching A Christmas Story.  The kid seems to really enjoy this movie, which makes me very happy, because I'm one of those people who actually watches 24 Hours of A Christmas Story when TNT or whatever does it.  What can I say?  I can't get enough Ralphie.  It's just not possible.

Here's an interesting A Christmas Story fact:  the whole movie takes place over only six days.  I only noticed this recently, but let me lay it out for you:

Day One:  Breakfast with the fantasy of shooting Black Bart and the gang, Flick gets his tongue stuck to a pole, Ralphie writes his theme on "What I Want For Christmas", his dad comes home and says he won a prize, they eat meatloaf for dinner, the leg lamp arrives.

Day Two:  Ralphie hands in his theme and fantasizes about getting an A+,  the family gets a Christmas tree, Ralphie says the F word then gets his mouth washed out with soap.

Day Three:  Ralphie gives Miss Shields a fruit basket, comes home to find his Little Orphan Annie secret decoder, finds out it's an sham commercial, the leg lamp breaks.

Day Four:  Ralphie gets his theme back with a C+ on it, he gets hit with a snowball on the way home and gets in a fight with Scut Farkus, cries, eats dinner without dad yelling at him.

Day Five:  Christmas Eve.  They go to a parade downtown that night, followed by the visit to Scary Santa where he gets pushed by a boot in the face down the terrifying winter wonderland slide.

Day Six:  Christmas Day.  Presents, Ralphie gets his gun, shoots his eye out, turkey eaten by the Bumpus hounds, and dinner at a Chinese restaurant.

For some reason, this was a huge revelation for me.  I had it in my head that the movie was over a whole month or something, I guess.  Not the case.  Ralphie really was cutting it close, waiting until Christmas Eve to ask Santa for a Red Ryder BB Gun, though, wasn't he?

Aren't Christmas movies just about the best darn thing ever? 
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